Pickleball can make or break a relationship—and in some cases, it can even lead to divorce.

Some couples play pickleball together effortlessly, while others avoid sharing the court to protect their relationship. But can pickleball really spark a split?

In a Reddit post, an anonymous user shared a story claiming that DUPR, the pickleball player rating system, played a role in their divorce.

“I started playing pickleball with my wife during COVID – just for fun. We were total noobs. Fast forward two years: I got obsessed, trained hard, hit 4.6 DUPR. She stayed at 3.2 and didn’t care to improve,” the user began. 

“We stopped partnering. Fought constantly. She said I cared more about DUPR than her. Then one night at rec play, we got matched up. I went full try-hard and Erne’d her twice. She cried. I said ‘Maybe if you drilled more. That wouldn’t have happened,’” the user added. 

“Divorce followed. Moral: DUPR is forever. Marriage wasn’t,” the post concluded. 

The breakdown of this relationship on the pickleball court stems from two key issues.

1.     Their enthusiasm for pickleball wasn’t mutual 

This is where the real problem begins.

For couples who discover pickleball together, it can be a beautiful thing. Date nights turn into evenings at the court. They make new friends, build a shared routine, and maybe even plan a trip to a new city to play in a PPA tournament. When both partners are equally invested, playing pickleball together can be genuinely fun and rewarding.

But when only one person catches the pickleball bug, that’s where trouble starts.

The addiction is real. And when it isn’t shared, one partner stays out late at the courts while the other sits at home, baffled by how open play somehow lasted four hours. Over time, resentment creeps in.

One DUPR climbs. The other stays the same.

And at that point, you have to wonder—is that just a pickleball rating, or a metaphor for two people growing at different speeds and slowly drifting apart?

Now, let’s look at the second issue.

2.     He Erne’d his wife

Some players simply don’t know how to read the court, or their wives. If you’re playing pickleball against your spouse and the marriage is already on shaky ground, that might be the moment to ease up. Or at the very least, don’t Erne her twice. Once can be a great shot. Twice feels personal.

Maybe a quick read of In a Pickle would help. The book offers a simple but valuable lesson for couples who play pickleball together: Don’t be a jerk. It really is that straightforward.

Life changes. Maybe your wife never falls in love with pickleball the way you do. But that doesn’t mean you should make her hate it. Being a ball hog, or landing a body bag or Nasty Nelson on your own spouse, isn’t going to do your relationship any favors.

Nevertheless, the comments were hilarious. 

“She gets half your DUPR in the divorce,” one opinion read. 

“She’s a 10… but she’s a 3.2,” added another user. 

One commenter, Ted Sholette, shared a story that stands out as a genuinely good lesson.

“I learned while dating my wife that her definition of playing a game (at the time racquetball) was not the same as mine. Fortunately for me, I loved her more than winning. Now that I’ve found pickleball, I still drill and want to improve. She’s happy learning at her own pace, and I will help her along the way, or we just dink and have fun,” he wrote.

So if you love your wife more than you love winning, a mismatch in DUPRs probably won’t divide your marriage. But if not… that DUPR gap could be the wedge that drives you apart.

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